Perfectionism Skills Group for Moms
An ongoing online skills group for moms who want to loosen perfectionism's grip and live in alignment with what actually matters — without losing the drive that defines them.
Tuesdays 2:00pm ET on Zoom · Join anytime
For most of your life, perfectionism was an asset. The rules — work harder, prepare more, double-check, never let anything slip — worked. They were how you knew you were doing it right.
The advice you've heard is some version of just let go. Which misses what perfectionism actually is. Perfectionism isn't a character flaw — it's a survival strategy that worked for a long time, and it's still trying to protect you. The problem is that it's been protecting you so long that it's slowly replaced your values with a set of rigid rules.
The rules feel important, non-negotiable. But, over-time they exhaust you, they drain your confidence, they make you snap at those you love, and most importantly, they take you away from appreciating the present moment.
Who this group is for
This group is for any mom who's tired of being run by perfectionism — whatever your work life looks like, whatever stage of motherhood you're in.
You might be working full-time in a demanding career. You might be home with your kids by choice or by circumstance. You might be on parental leave, in a transition, building something of your own, working part-time, or somewhere between those. The shape of your week matters less than what's happening inside it.
What you have in common with the other women in this group is the inner experience. The mental loops. The bar that keeps rising. The to-do lists that never get short enough. The voice that tells you that you should be doing more, doing it better, doing it without complaining. The exhausting gap between how you appear on the outside and how depleted you feel on the inside.
You may be pre-pregnancy and quietly worried about what motherhood might do to you. You may be pregnant and watching the rules tighten in real time. You may be postpartum and stunned that the strategies that worked your whole life suddenly don't. You may be three years in, or eight years in, or fifteen, and still wondering when you'll feel like yourself again.
You want to feel like yourself again — and you want a structured way to actually practice that, not just read about it. You want to be in a room with other women who get it without needing it explained.
Six skills, practiced together.
The group is built around the six core skills of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy — a research-supported approach that doesn't try to eliminate perfectionist thoughts (it can't, and you wouldn't want it to). Instead, ACT teaches you to relate to those thoughts differently, so they stop running the show.
Members work through Jennifer Kemp's ACT Workbook for Perfectionism alongside each other.
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Underneath the rules perfectionism has built, there are values — what you actually care about. The values most moms surface are expansive: their children, their work, the kind of person they want to be. Once you can see those clearly, separate from the rules, you have something to navigate by.
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Perfectionism lives in the past (replaying mistakes) and the future (preemptively solving problems that haven't happened). Mindfulness here isn't sitting on a cushion — it's the practical skill of noticing where your attention has gone and returning to where you actually are.
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You should be doing more. You're going to fall behind. Stepping back doesn't mean arguing with the thoughts. It means recognizing them as thoughts — not commands, not facts — and choosing whether to obey them.
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A lot of perfectionism is driven by trying to escape uncomfortable feelings. The paradox is that fighting them makes them louder. You practice letting discomfort be there without needing to fix it or out-prepare it.
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You've been telling yourself stories about who you are — I'm the perfectionist. I'm always behind. I'm never quite enough. The stories feel like facts. They're not. There's a part of you that has been watching all those stories the whole time — the same "you" that was here at five years old and is here today. When you can rest in that perspective, the stories become something you can examine and revise, rather than something you have to keep being.
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Knowing your values isn't enough. The work is acting from them in real life, especially when perfectionism is yelling that you're doing it wrong. Each session includes practice identifying small, values-aligned actions you can take during the week.
How the Perfectionism Skills Group works:
The group meets every Tuesday at 2:00pm - 2:50 on Zoom.
The format mirrors how the skills actually need to be learned: a brief teaching segment, structured practice, group discussion, and an experiment to take into your week. We work through The ACT Workbook for Perfectionism by Jennifer Kemp as the backbone, with chapter readings between sessions and live practice in session. Members bring what they're actually navigating — the deadline that's looming, the parenting moment they couldn't stop replaying, the project they can't seem to start.
The group is ongoing, not a fixed-length series. You join when there's a spot, and you stay as long as the work is useful. Some will stay three months. Some stay a year. There's no commitment beyond month-to-month.
Investment: $349/month, self-pay.
About Stephanie
I'm Dr. Stephanie Thrower — a licensed psychologist, the founder of Thrower Consulting and Therapy, and a mother of three. My work centers on the intersection of maternal mental health and career.
My clinical approach draws on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, performance psychology, and a feminist-informed lens that names the systems women are inside — not just their individual experience. I'm not interested in optimizing you. I'm interested in helping you reconnect with what actually matters to you, and then practice acting from there.
I run this group because I believe more women should have access to this work. And honestly — because I've been one of those women, and I know what changes when this work lands.
FAQs
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No. This is a skills group — educational and practice-based. There's no diagnosis, no intake assessment, no clinical record. If you're already working with an individual therapist, the group complements that work; if you're not, the group is not a substitute for individual care if you need it. We can talk through that on the consult call.
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Oh my gosh, no. The work isn't to lower your standards — it's to reconnect with what your standards were supposed to be protecting. Most women find that as they get clearer on their values, they make sharper decisions about where to invest their excellence, not fewer. The drive doesn't go away. It just stops running you without permission.
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No. The group is designed for individuals who are functioning well on the outside and depleted on the inside. You don't need a breakdown to deserve this work.
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Life happens. Members are expected to come consistently, but missing occasional sessions is normal. Sessions aren't recorded — the group needs to be a confidential space — but you'll have the workbook and your group connection between sessions.
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Monthly enrollment is $349.
Because this is not treatment/therapy, this will not be covered by insurance. -
There's no fixed length. Some will stay three to four months and feel complete. Others stay a year or more. You'll know when you're ready to step out, and there's no pressure either way.
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Reading is a start and I would love more people to read this book. The group offers a place to process the skills and knowledge gained - and it’s always awesome to have some accountability.
If you're ready:
The work doesn't start when you join the group. It starts the moment you stop telling yourself you should be able to figure this out on your own.
If something on this page really connected, the next step is a brief consult call.
We'll talk about what's going on for you, whether this group is the right fit, and what joining looks like.
There's no pressure on the call. If the group isn't right for you, I'll say so. If it is, we'll talk logistics.